When Children are Struggling to Calm Down by Dr. Munn Saechao, Child & Adolescent Psychotherapist in Mountain View, CA & Online Psychotherapist and Coach for Women with Adhd, Autism, Anxiety & Depression.
When children feel angry, rejected, shamed, embarrassed, overwhelmed, or dysregulated in any way, they need us to be there for them; in other words, they need us to connect.
Connection might mean a hug, a soft touch, a soft look, or validation of their emotions. When we connect and soothe our children, they regain control.
Connection is key to emotional regulation, particularly for young children who have very limited capacity to modulate their emotions and behaviors.
Once children are in calm state, the next step is to ask yourself this, “Is my child ready to hear me; ready to learn; ready to comprehend?” If the question is no, more connection is needed. If it’s yes, teach the lesson.
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Disclaimer: The content in this post is only intended to increase your knowledge on parenting and child development; it is not online therapy. If you’re concerned about your child’s immediate safety please call 911 and consult with a licensed clinician about any clinical symptoms you are experiencing.